Why Do Weddings Have To Cost So Much?
I just came from my friend Gary Simpson’s blog and he had pictures of his daughter’s wedding on it and it got me to thinking about my wedding long ago and how times have sure changed. This started out as a comment on his blog but the more I typed I said I should post this on my blog. So here we are.
Weddings are out of control these days. I don’t know how people can afford it.
You want to hear one of those “when I was a kid” stories. NO! Too Bad, I’m going to tell you anyway.
My wedding cost $50. Yep, that’s not a misprint. We had our dream wedding all planned way before we got married. We lived together for three and a half years before we got married so we had plenty of time to think about what we wanted our wedding to be like.
We said we wanted to buy a house first and get married in it right in front of the fireplace. Well, that’s exactly what we did 31 years ago. I asked the Minister from my church to come to my house and marry us and that’s where the $50 bucks went, to pay the Minister.
We just had family and a few close friends over then they all took us out to a local restaurant. That’s it.
Our honeymoon was a laugher.
We went about 70 miles to the ocean for two days and the one night we spent there we slept in the back of my pickup truck. At least I had a cap on the truck bed so we were protected from the elements. We didn’t mind because at the time we were avid campers as we both love the outdoors. I did have a mattress in the back of the truck and that’s what we used to sleep on when we went camping. It was quite comfy as a matter of fact. It was better than sleeping on the cold damp ground in sleeping bags.
I know, it sounds like one of Jeff Foxworthy’s redneck jokes. But I couldn’t get any time off from work(not even to get married)so we did this on the weekend.
That’s it. That was the extent of our wedding. Nothing fancy or expensive. Just lots of Love. That’s all we needed. Both my wife and I were raised to appreciate the little things in life and that you didn’t have to spend a ton of money to enjoy yourself.
That’s where things have changed in this world. Now a days these young kids seem to think their parents have thousands of dollars to spend on their weddings. I just pulled these numbers off the Internet so it’s not like I’m making this up. The average wedding in 2007 cost $27,490. In 2008 the price plummeted to $21,814 and it’s anticipated it will drop another 10 percent in 2009 during these tough economic times. Still, $21,814 for a wedding. Are you kidding me.
I think this is ludicrous. This doesn’t even include the cost for the honeymoon or engagement ring. I didn’t check on the cost of these two items but I’m guessing it’s between eight and ten thousand dollars. Add this to the wedding costs and you have a whopping $30,000.
That’s more than I paid for my first house. And that brings me to the point I’m trying to make. Especially with today’s economy don’t you think the brides could be less selfish and give up a few things to bring the cost down a little. Yes I said the brides, because let’s be honest here. Guys really don’t care. They just want to get married and really don’t care where.
If you want my opinion, and I don’t care if you do because I’m going to give it to you anyway, young couples could have a nice little back yard wedding or something similar for $5,000. That leaves $25,000 that could be used as a down payment on a new house. This is something that could last them the rest of their lives instead of having nothing to show for it accept an album full of wedding pictures.
I know so many people that have their kids live with them because they can’t even afford an apartment. I think that’s terrible. Where are our kids priorities and why should the parents be stuck paying the bill. There are more grandparents raising there grandchildren and they all say they love it and maybe they do but I still don’t agree with it.
Parents should be bringing up there own kids and not dumping them off on the grandparents. I don’t have any grandchildren but if I did I would love to have them visit but at least I could send them home when I wanted. I already raised a son and I don’t want to raise anymore.
I think I got off my point somewhere along the line here. As you can see this is a touchy subject for me.
Times have changed and people better start waking up. Parents can’t afford to pay for college AND a huge wedding for their kids. I know we all want the best for our kids but if you don’t have the money to afford these extravagant weddings then the kids need to show some restraint and scale down a little.
No, a lot.
OK, I’m done venting. I need to stop now as I could go one forever on this topic.
Let me know what your thoughts are on this subject.
til next time…
Tagged with: dream wedding • wedding • wedding cost • wedding pictures • weddings
Filed under: General
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despite being a young 20-something female who dreams of her own dream wedding, i fully agree with you.
i worked banquets throughout college as a waitress and a lot of my friends have gotten married recently or are planning their weddings. so i’ve been immersed in weddings for nearly a decade and quite frankly think what people spend on weddings for futile things is pretty ridiculous as well. i would personally just like to have a huge cookout in a family member’s country home after a religious ceremony at church. and i’m sure my parents would appreciate that as well.
but i also think one thing you forgot to mention is – why don’t people just pay for their own weddings? my parents paid for my college education, which i think is plenty and would hope that once i do get married, i’ll be able to pay for my own wedding along with my husband-to-be.
my two cents? – want a huge wedding with all the extras? great. can’t afford it? then save up for it.
Hey Polyana,
No I didn’t forget to mention that I believe people should have to pay for their own weddings. I just didn’t want to rant anymore plus I figured I had already made my point. It’s refreshing to see you as a young female agree with the things that I said.
Oh BTW, I went to your blog and you were actually complaining about it being cold when it’s 60 degrees F. Are you kidding? I would take 60 degrees F all year round. You make mention of living in New England at some point. Well that’s where I live and I can’t tell you how many days this past winter it was below 0 degrees F. It was at least 15 days and it snowed every other day. You must have a short memory if you used to live here. Maybe the cold just froze your brain. lol!
One last thing. Nice Pink Nails.
Later,
Jeff Sargent
Oh Jeff,
I gotta admit that I was nodding my head all the way through that most “Gazza-like RANT” and then you said this…
Oh Man! I just laughed my head off – THAT sounds SO much like me it is freakin’ scary. You must be spending FAR too much time at my blog! PMSL.
Anyway – shock revelation coming up – my daughter’s wedding cost $50,000. Thankfully her in-laws are wonderful people and we split the cost right down the middle. But we did have to buy the wedding dress – about $5,000. So my “investment” alone was $30,000.
Agggghh, it was OUT-OF-CONTROL. But she is my only daughter and I love her so much. To make her day so memorable I was glad to spend the money – even though I grumbled about every bill that came across my desk to pay. My usual reaction was “WHAT????!!!”
You see, ALL the vendors – limo drivers, venue, caterers, flower people, photographers – the WHOLE BLOODY LOT of them all know that there is NO logic to the event. It is 100% emotion and that is why they double and even treble their prices. They are vipers.
Anyway, thanks for the opportunity to add to your rant. I could go on and on and on…
Regards
Gary
GazzMan
TEMPLE
Hey Gary,
Thanks for your comment.
When I was writing this post I didn’t realize that I was writing about you. Are you kidding me, $50,000. I hope you at least got drunk at your daughter’s wedding to help ease the pain. LOL!
Later,
Jeff Sargent
Hi Jeff,
Thanks for dropping by my blog and leaving your nice comment about the autism mothers.
I know just what you mean about the cost of weddings these days. It’s got completely out of control. It makes me feel ill just thinking about the money that’s wasted especially as few marriages seem to last these days.
Admittedly, it was 34 years ago, but my wedding probably cost about $400 and that included the honeymoon!
Take care,
Jean
Hey Jean,
I’m glad you could swing by and thanks for the comment.
I don’t want to get started on a rant about wedding costs again so I won’t get started. Once I do I won’t be able to control myself and I’ll end up writing a 3 page reply here.
We are kind of giving our age away here Jean aren’t we. I mentioned in this post I have been married 31 years and you got me beat at 34. That goes to show you that marriage longevity has nothing to do with how much you spend as you mention here your wedding cost $400 and mine was only $50. We must have both picked the right soul mates.
Later,
Jeff Sargent
Hi Jeff,
Yes why do weddings cost so much my son is getting married in a few months and just the cost of the reception is more than we spent on our whole wedding, but that was 40 years ago.
We all want the best for our kids, but I think the time has come when the kids will have to be paying something towards college tuition and weddings.
This was a great post you obviously think the same as me on this subject.
Best wishes
Christine
Thanks for stopping by Christine.
You say in your comment that we all want the best for our kids and of course I agree. But I think it’s about time we all agree that it’s best for our kids if we start teaching them better values. If we don’t start doing it now then our grand kids will be even more spoiled and expect bigger and better (and more expensive) weddings.
And the reason weddings cost so much in the first place is simply because of greed. I mean c’mon, $5,000 for a wedding cake. All the vendors know that parents will spare no cost for their kid’s wedding to make it a very special and memorable day so they jack the price up three, four and five times what they are worth. And as long as we keep paying those exorbitant amounts they will keep doing it.
Later,
Jeff Sargent
I agree 100%. When my husband and I got married we already had one child and another on the way. Now don’t get me wrong, I still believe in the old fashioned ways but there is a lot to say for putting things off, especially nowdays. We couldn’t afford to get married and he was unemployed and waited until he got a good job. He also paid a preacher and we had a small private ceremony at the preacher’s house. Then we had a nice little reception at a chinese restaurant then we went home to our life. We didn’t even spend the night away from home until we’d been married for ten years and that was for one night on our tenth anniversary. We used to take our teenagers to the skating rink and have a “date” out once in a while. And we stayed married until he died in 2005. Most of the people who spend all that money on these fancy weddings don’t stay married for more than a few years then it’s several thousand bucks being forked out for a divorce and the man gets stuck paying child support for 18 years.
I think before I say I do again I’ll say I don’t and just be happy being single. It’s a lot cheaper.
Hi Jeff,
Great post. I agree with you 100%. Wedding prices are crazy now days. When my wife and I got married we actually spent very little on the wedding. We were just two poor college students and got married during a break in the semester so we didn’t even have a chance for a honeymoon until later. People laugh but we just never caught that big fancy wedding fever.
Well, getting married in Cyprus (Europe)
(Greek Orthodox wedding) is just like a ..
successful product launch!
A BIG wedding can cost you up to $50,000!
(hotel, wedding restaurant, ceremony, photographer,
music, decoration, honeymoon, limousine etc) BUT…
When you have 2,000 guests (friends of the bride,
etc)
groom, parents people you meet only once..
and each guest gives $50 (on average) that’s
$100,000!!!
A successful “wedding” launch can actually earn you
up to $50,000 in a single day!
This is just crazy was is happening here in Cyprus..
Anyway, I also wanted to mention that there are many couples (mostly from the United Kingdom) that are
getting married in Cyprus because it combines both the wedding and honeymoon
I never heard of such a thing, getting 2000 guests to each give you $50. Forget about playing the lottery, I think I’ll just go get married again in Cyprus. In fact maybe I’ll renew my vows every year. lol!
Later,
Jeff Sargent
Every woman wants a great wedding to remember. Sad to say, but a wedding is in high demand… haha… Great article!
I believe it depends on the couple if they wanted expensive wedding. I didn’t spend much on my wedding. What happened was, I had a lot of sponsors and pledgers.Somebody donated cake, materials for the invitation, we selected the cheap photographers, etc. I remembered the material thing we bought for that day was my wedding gown.We had a very memorable wedding
I am going to be gettin married for the second time next year and we have precisely £0 towards it at the moment and yet we aren’t really bothered. I spent about £5,000 the first time round and look where its got me.
Thanks for stopping by and leaving your comment.
Good for you…you don’t need to spend a fortune on your wedding in order to be happy. Save some of that money to buy another limo.
I love your Hellfire limo…if I’m ever in the UK I’d love a ride in it.
Later,
Jeff Sargent
Its true that every woman wants a great wedding to remember. because it happens 0nce in a lifetime, but if u really love the girl, then its worth it!great article!
This is so true! Ridiculous as it seems but that’s how atrociously expensive weddings are these days.
For me. It is not necessary that your wedding should be expensive. You can make it priceless but worth it by using recycled materials. Like for example.. a wedding gown, instead of buying a new set you can rent that one. and for the reception there are many more option to get which is cheaper. It only matters on how your organizer do it.